It’s YOUR day

26/12/2021

Being selfish is a good thing – Alternative Wedding guide

A fun engagement shoot | Alternative Wedding Photography

Congratulations!

You’re recently engaged, it’s the best Christmas ever, you can’t believe it! You’re the happiest person in the world and boy/girl didn’t “done good” as you’re not that type of person?

But what next?

Well you celebrate and you celebrate hard. You deserve this, you both do. It’s your magical time, for you and those around you. Post all you like, it’s not spam, it’s love and like your ring you’re proud to show it off!

When do we plan?

This is entirely up to you, you can wait or go for it now, but it needs to be right for you.

Here are 5 top tips to help you get what you want from your wedding whatever your budget.

1 – Choose your vibe

First things first, you can have your dream wedding if you start with a plan of what you want. It is so easy to get distracted by social media, by those that will suggest what they would have, and by fear of over spending, but trust me, if you start with a plan of exactly what you want, you will achieve it.

Pinterest is a great search engine for your wedding inspo! Create a board that you can both add to and then once you’re ready to go, use this to show suppliers. They will without doubt thank you for having an idea of what you want. While suppliers will want to use their own creativity, having an idea of what you want to achieve will be a useful guide for everyone.

Is your vibe a tea party or a wild party? Either way it’ll be a blast!

You could even invite suppliers to the page to add inspo. This will help make your planning more conversational and organic too.

2 – Work out who is paying

Money is always a bit of a taboo when it comes to weddings but it doesn’t need to control your creativity. My advice, pay all you can yourselves. You may have folk that want to help you and that’s fab, but take control of it. If anybody does offer money to help, then of course take it. Thank them without doubt, but tell them how you plan on spending it because I have seen sooooo many times, a parent offer money and then want to tell a couple how it should be spent. Remember, its your day, not theirs or anybody else’s and if you want perfect, then you need to keep control.

3 – Create a dream team

Whether you’re having a DIY wedding or a day at a venue that have 100’s of weddings a year, make sure you engineer a team of creatives that match your vibe. Hotels can be fab as they’ll know loads of suppliers but be warned, there are so many hotels and venues that either have the same suppliers over and over again, or never update their supplier lists. My advice, don’t rely on them to help you create your vibe. Go solo, get your suppliers right and create a team that will sweat and work for, and with you. Every supplier you use will know of another suppler who can help, and who they know will smash it out of the park for you both.

Independent suppliers are more likely to create unique moments and magical days for you, where venues can fall back onto copy and paste! You don’t want the same wedding as the last lot do you? The extra work is worth it, trust me.

4- Book suppliers early

Once you find a venue, supplier, florist, MUA etc that you love, stop looking and book them. There is no point whatsoever in trying to find another one better. Fall in love with their art and book them. Tell them why you love them and start working on your plan. If they aren’t available, then ask them for alternatives. Whoever it is, book early and don’t miss out.

Wonderful flowers from Wild Flower Workshop , hand made dress from Wendy at Flossy & Dossy

Can’t find the right people? Then don’t panic and keep looking. You need (such a strong word, but true) to LOVE your suppliers work so much, if you don’t then they aren’t right for you.

I have spoken to so many couples who haven’t loved the wedding photographer they have booked, and I just don’t understand that? Your day needs to be perfect? That’s what you want? So don’t settle until you have it.

5 – Take full control and zero shit

Parents, friends, wedding co-ordinators may all try to tell you what to do! Listen out for those that say “should” and those that say “could”, engage with the latter type!

As mentioned before if you don’t take control it slowly starts to slip away from that perfect day you set out for. Parents will want a say, but you’ll know your relationship better than anyone so manage how you think is best. Yes they may have chucked you a few pound notes but does that mean you want their neighbours, best friends cousins , sister at your wedding day? Absolutely not!

Resident wedding co-ordinators can be helpful of course but I’ve seen the great side and the negative control side. Your day needs to be your day, I’ll always say that. Work it all to your time scales, listen to suggestions but have it all your way. They’ll often be there for the easier option and the easy ride, you are there for the best day of your lives, so plan it your way, control it all and party hard. Really fucking hard!